Saturday, April 05, 2008

Gulgappi Tales

Gulgappi is a close friend.I was all in awe of Gulgappis profile when I heard about him for the first time.He had topped most exams that he had written in his life and is a gold medalist from a reputed institution .As soon as Gulgappi opened his mouth all my awe evaporated into thin air due to some super secret reasons.

Gulgappi who was a simpleton changed soon and became a street smart kaneeme .Once we went to meet a North Indian Professor and as soon as Professor opened his door Gulgappi bend down and touched his feet . I don't know how Gulgappi suddenly became aware of a custom which symbolized respect for elders. Whatever! Gulgappi scored A+ in the paper of that professor and since I didn't touch the feet I could get only an A-.There are many Gulgappi tales like this in B School.

Gulgappi got placed in a prestigious Management Consulting firm and then we lost touch.One day I met Gulgappi accidentally at Hyderabad and Gulgappi invited me for his marriage .He showed me the photo of a good looking girl .Gulgappi got a very good deal for his high flying consulting job and few academic gold medals and the B School gossip was that dowry was in eight digits which was usually followed by a debate on whether dowry is an archaic custom. Most people who engage in such kind of debates like Gulgappi agree unanimously that dowry is a bad practice but forgets what they said few months before their marriage.

But Gulgappi screwed up big time.

Gulgappi was from a middle class family and like all middle class families had been taught to live with dignity amidst all financial and other constraints . His wife was from a rich and affluent family and like all affluent families searched for prestige in whatever they did . For them Gulgappi's profile , MBA degree and gold medals were more valuable than Gulgappi as a person. If you see matrimonial ads in Times of India in Delhi then Big Fat Mallu wedding is nothing .

Gulgappi is from a North Indian town and had not seen his mother questioning his father in his life .Gulgappi's s wife was of a totally different mould and offered her suggestions to Gulgappi and had her own opinions.She is also from a top institution and wanted to pursue her own career .Quite Understandable , she would have struggled equally hard like Gulgappi to get good qualifications. There was no problem for Gulgappi before marriage and he wanted his wife to be exactly like that - independent , modern etc. But now he thinks this is affecting his family life as differences are surfacing.To make it short their wavelengths as well as frequencies did not match.

Gulgappi and his wife were hi-flying consultants and usually traveled abroad as a part of their work. Gulgappi works in Singapore and his wife works in Dubai. Both of them fly to India in weekends that too when they were not busy with work and met for some time. From outside everything looked fine but the friend circle was abuzz with lot of gossips including some very inquisitive queries on when they had " seks " ?.

Poor Gulgu! Last time I met him he was really depressed . He didn't know where he went wrong . He had struggled hard all his life , went to top institutions , has a beautiful wife , has loads of money. All are the social parameters of successful life. Gulgappi wants his wife to quit job or get a transfer to Singapore . His wife does not want it as this project will give a huge boost to her career and the project will go on for at least two years. Gulgu doesn't want to shift either because he is doing so well in Singapore. Gulgu is actually a nice chap and not a proper kaneeme his wife also seems to be a nice gal with common sense.

There are some MBA Case studies where everything seems Ok with an organization but you can see some odd symptoms of failure here and there . These symptoms slowly grows to big problems and finally things go haywire.

Can someone help Gulgu?


Amooma said...

well, what r ur suggs?? or dont u have any??
theirs is the PERFEECT life, from the outside. they seem to be the couple everyone wants to be. but well, if THATS what the perfect couple lives like, im staying single!!!!

Ami Shah said...

Its sad....getting really difficult these days, when couples like this one, lead a "seemingly perfect and envious life" but at the compromise of the most importatnt feeling in life --" togetherness" ! I think the best way here is -- they find something suitable in a different place or strike a balance asap!

ursjina said...

ur back with a bang i can see..u know wat we shud have polygamy and polyandry..;)

Adorable Pancreas said...

I don't know, but I feel lkinda sorry for him. He did everything that society expected of him, and lost his happiness in the process.

Macadamia The Nut said...

I think the problem here is the individual (employee?) and not the relationship (organization?)Same scenario, different guy... things could 'click'

Ajith said...

"as soon as Professor opened his door Gulgappi bend down and touched his feet ." -- i see this 'soapifying' aspect distinctly among consult - oriented people :)

Nariyal Chutney said...

@amooma: I dont have any . Thought someone will be able to help through this blog post :P

@ami-shah - may be they should strike a balance , something suitable at a different place may be painful for both of them

@Jina: Yes with bang bang :). Polygamy may not be a bad idea :D

@Adorable Pancreas : Cant say . Sometimes people equate happiness with the money they have or the achievements in their life. By these standards , he is happy :D

@MT Nut : :(. But since the individuals are same and organization does not change it cant be a solution :((.

@ajith: Yupz , We know the traits in when we see it in B Schhol :P

Girl With Big Eyes said...

With my agony aunt hat on....

I suggest that both of them quit their current jobs, come to London and gear up for a fresh start.

So no one can complain and both sacrifices a little bit for each other.

PS: on a totally different note, if my solution helped them, can I use their frequent flyer benefits, please?


alex said...

The solution: divorce

Between, such incidents are very common; though the fear of divorce keeps them together-a sad married life.